Happy Mother’s Day, (belated) to all you Mother’s out there! I for one have mixed feelings this year. My own Mother read me the riot act just the other day for talking about some shit that happened in my own childhood. The story was in my mind harmless and funny, but mom was not amused. My Mother was typing up a report for me for school, back before computers I would have her type things up for me because she was in the hell that I now live, office work. She knew how to type well, I didn’t, and of course my shit was due tomorrow, or Monday, I think it was the weekend.
Anyway she is typing and she is rightfully mad at me, because I waited till the last minute, and she runs out of paper. So she sends my brother to the neighbor’s house to get some printer paper. Now my brother was tripping on acid that day and remembers only that she asked for paper and then, her yelling at him, and that is basically the story. Now looking back, to me, that is funny, can you imagine trying to do errands on acid! impossible (from what I hear, I honestly never did it, but I’ve seen it done and I repeat, impossible.)
Mom is pissed for telling this story to my in-laws, and tells me to keep our business just in the family like we are 1920’s gangsters or something, so probably this post will get me in more trouble someday, Luckily, no one ever reads this blog. So mom’s pissed and I can’t figure out why so I ask. And she tells me (shockingly) because she feels like she failed somehow because my brother is a fuck up, and why do I want to tell her stories of failure. Well I never, ever, ever felt my mom failed us, my brother is just a fuck up. Some people are just fuck ups. I don’t even blame my brother, he seems happy enough. He doesn’t even do acid anymore and he is not, but any economic standard successfull, but again he is happy so…
I’m sorry mom and I love you and I’m sorry you feel judged by the world. I feel that way too sometimes. I guess you are not going to sigh off on this book I’m writing about my childhood. I want to own my life I guess. I want to laugh about the craziness, not stuff it away and freak out when someone else brings it up. Oh, and don’t read this post mom, you won’t like it.
I put my book back up on Smashwords. That premium Kindle this didn’t work for me. I guess my book just doesn’t grab people and drive them to read it. I’ll try again but I think this year might be out, it’s May already and my day job is getting weird. I would hate to have to change jobs, that will put me out of writing for another year but you have to do what you have to do. Whatever, go to smashwords turn on adult content and search on ‘From Light to Life’ and thanks.