Such a simple thing to do right? Wrong. To pay attention is difficult. Very difficult, you are not thinking, you are just watching and listening. But keep working too you can’t just watch, you are a participant. What a crazy world we live in and what crazy lives we lead. Hang tough friends. We will get to the end wether we want to or not. What will they say about you at the end? Good things? Or he/she was a miserable prick/cunt? What I dislike the most, I guess, is theirs idea that I must climb this dominance hierarchies. This eternal fight to beat the other monkeys. It’s tiring! But we continue on, never surrender!! Will you hit the top, probably not, but never let them think you knew that all along, keep pushing like you will be the next boss or the next family leader etc. and they won’t say of you that you gave up. Wouldn’t that be the worst thing you could do? Give up. And should end up there, then you can think. Wield that power with honesty, grace, bravery and with as much morality as you can muster. So in a word. Persist.
Look I spent the whole day raking leaves yesterday. It’s just one day, I know but there are many tasks like this when you have a house. Cleaning, you must clean guys. Mowing, repairs. Spray for bugs, mouse traps. All that stuff takes time and mental cycles. All time you could be writing, or planning on writing or ‘gearing up’ to write etc.
Double all this time if you have kids. No, triple it. Anyway, if you can afford it. Outsource this stuff and spend a little time with said kids or spend that time doing what you want to do, creating and writing. Seems crazy, right? I never thought I would be able to do that but here I am and here you are and here we are so let’s go. Call someone today to clean your house once a week, or shovel the driveway in the winter. It will cost a couple bucks, but that is why you are still working that suck day job right?
So yeah, I’ve come to a revelation. I want to write literature. Not just stories. I want to preach and most people despise that, especially when it’s not even that entertaining (I think I’m entertaining, just making a point here.) Most writers/readers I’ve met are only looking for entertainment. Nothing wrong with that, but that’s not what I want to do. I want to entertain, but mix in some preaching too. Because that is what literature does right? Uplifts, teaches. All art should do this right? I’m stuck on the stuffy side of art I guess, and when said art is not satisfying to me. I’ll bitch. Except I won’t bitch publicly and name names because I refuse to bad mouth anyone, but I will vaguely bitch about life and so on. It’s just what I do. So where does all this leave me. Fuck. I don’t know. Here I guess.
Persist. That is all there is to do. And really, for me, I need to tune out all the nonsense out there and persist. I’m writing something that is mostly entertainment now, but I want to subtly work in some life lessons about friendship and bullies and bravery etc. I’ll post here how it turns out. Should wrap up by summer 2017. I’ve decided not to self-publish this next one. I want to be on the shelves man. I’m going to do the next 5-8 years trying to get published the old way. I’ll blog and let you know how it goes.
Here is an article that makes what I just said sound stupid and they are right. Crap. http://www.esquire.com/entertainment/books/a33599/genre-fiction-vs-literary-fiction/
350-360/42,000 I’ve started a new story. Looking forward to writing again, it’s been too long. This blog has become a constant for me. One thing I can just do and not worry too much about. I place to come back to and see how whiny I was back when, how productive, how whatever.
I’ve been through three jobs this year. Fought with many people that I love. Found help where I could and when I needed it most. But I’ll never stop being creative. It’s what I am and what I do. I will never surrender. Surrender is death. Forgive your past. Forget the future. Live now and write.
How to you stop writing. Simple. Live your life. Get depressed. Focus on work, family, friends or whatever. You can let others pull you in a thousand directions, or you can just say no. NO!
Those in trenches, I salute you and your efforts this week, month and year. I’m in there too, taking shit from ‘the man,’ working hard and dreaming big. Hang in there and know that we will triumph! Here is to you!
I’ve had to switch gears, I wanted very badly to tell my story but could not. The emotions were wrecking my productivity and mood, I had to put it down and stay focused on the here and now.
Instead I’ve started a little board game project. I’ll be doing first playtests this week and will report back for the none of you who give a squirt.
Ug!! Issue three failed in Ohio. I can’t decide if Ohioans are smart for preventing monopolies are stupid for not allowing legal weed and thus ending all the stupid issues around that prohibition, i.e. ruining young lives, bloated incarceration system, advocation of an inferior intoxicant in alcohol.
Did they just buy the marketing or do they really care about monopolies? Cable is still a monopoly, so are the casinos.
I think here in the midwest we care a bit more about the blossoming inequality of wealth in America, for what we understand of this issue. Me? I just want to legally smoke weed.
What is the difference between a big Ego and having confidence? I would say ego is selfish. Confidence cares about more than you, it cares about you, them and the task at hand. Confidence is so very important in everything you want to accomplish. You need to know you will accomplish it before you accomplish it. Ego can help you do this too, but ego will crush anyone (including you) who gets in the way of the task.
So chill out all you ego maniacs and make room for those of us with true confidence. Of course this statement is silly, they won’t make room, that is why we call them ego maniacs. So the true confident people will always clash with those with ego.
So yeah, I joined what is essentially a Midwest start up at 41. What could go wrong?!? I did this once before and it lasted six months (2008 financial meltdown strike any chords?), to say I’m nervous is an understatement. But I would not be me if I just sat in one place and wasted away. I won’t. And I won’t tolerate miserable bosses and people in my life for long either. Don’t waste your time and breath on these people. Fight if you have the fortitude but move the fuck on if you have to.
Regardless I’m going to give it my all. So you should see more postings here as I, hopefully, become less miserable.
Midwest start ups are not so much like the west coast (based on my knowledge of the Silicon Valley HBO show.) The two Midwest super small companies I’ve seen now were both backed by giant companies. And don’t think because we are not west coast that we don’t work as hard as you do. We often work harder because we have families and homes and yards to care for. Functional families that is, you know who you are. But unfortunately we also have guys who still think it’s 1980 and they can ‘kick ass and take names’ or ‘do what I want because I’m the boss and I say what goes and this ‘coders’ are just resources.’ okay, whatever, I don’t even know what I’m bitching about anymore.
Just wanted to post something. Been a while. For that one guy who reads this blog. I love you man.
I’d rather be the Pope. I’m with you Prince. The Pope has influence. The right Pope changes hearts and minds. I just read the National Geographic article on the Pope. Go see it here. http://ngm.nationalgeographic.com/2015/08/vatican/draper-text Worth a read, even if you are not Catholic. This got me thinking about America and our seemingly increasing number of poor people. I want the Pope to put on a disguise and come here and visit our inner cities, skid row, and rural areas. He is the kind of guy who does this thing…read the article. There is something magical about this, the prince who comes down to the market to be with the people.
I’d like the Pope to come see American poor. It’s real and it’s not people lying about on the street, though we have that too. Check this out http://www.reuters.com/article/2013/09/17/us-usa-economy-poverty-idUSBRE98G0PN20130917
I’d like the Pope to see how Americans treat our poor with utter disgust. “Oh I’m sorry you can’t think clearly because you are bi-polar, but hey that’s not my problem, I’m taking my kids out on the boat today.” “Work harder, work smarter, it’s your fault you are poor. You are a stupid, lazy, fucker.” Okay, maybe I got carried away, but trust me, there are Americans who think this way.
Let’s not discount those that take advantage of the system. They exist for sure. But most people are not poor by choice and most of them are working full time! And those that have never tasted poverty have no idea. No damn idea how terrifying it can be, the other people that are poor are not your friends, the poor don’t band together and help each other out. They suffer quietly in fear or they battle each other for what they think is the little bit of territory or money or whatever is available to them. Often, poor people are angry, and it just comes out in all their interactions with everyone. Often they are not sane. And so much of that anger, self-hatred and mental issues, come from the wealthy people and middle class people and the ultra-competitive corporate structure we live under in America, and how those people caught up in these things treat the poor. That is, like shit.
As a lapsed Catholic I recall the stories of Jesus from my Catholic grade school were never of him hanging out in a palace or by the pool (bath, whatever,) but he was with the poor. He was in the street with the people. I guess I’m just touched by this Pope. I hope he does bring change.
Catholics used to be the underdog in America, they were the newcomers and the working people fighting the existing rich for a chance at success. Well they got it, now Catholics are like the rest of America, striving, competitive, shitting on those below them. What would Francis think of you Mr. Business manager? What Would the Pope think of you when you do that fake check for change on the street and keep walking? What would Jesus do?
That is all for the religious stuff from me. It’s something I like to think about, but it may be too much for many of you so that is it. Thanks for taking a minute to tune in, go to google and type in your city name and “food donation.”